As somebody who readily falls into the category of "other", I am curious as to why Muslims — and indeed people who fall under the crude misnomer "of Middle Eastern appearance" — are on this end of the deep and bitter wedge that has been forged in Australia.
There is a fracture in our society and, rather than feel optimistic about it healing, I feel increasingly apprehensive about it worsening. Is it because the criminals who attacked America on September 11, professed to be Muslim although their actions clearly abrogated any such claim? The language of the "Coalition of the Willing" has only ever been coloured with statements about the "terrorists attacking our way of life" and "our values".
By the crude logic of shock-jocks and politicians anxious for votes, the purported alliance of the terrorists with Islam renders Australian Muslims and Australians of Arabic background because the misconception is that every Arab is a Muslim equally suspect as antagonistic to "Australian values".
Of Middle Eastern appearance - Griffith Review
There have been various attempts to define Australian values. A fair go, egalitarianism, gender equality — all values critics have pointed out are universal human values, certainly not values over which Australia can claim intellectual property rights. However, the way in which the debate plays out demonstrates that it is not a generalist values debate. How Muslims view labour laws, free trade, the environment or capitalism has never been at the heart of the issue.
The values debate has ostensibly focused on women's dress and attitudes to certain social norms such as alcohol, a day at the beach or sexuality. Integration, fitting in, assimilation: There were a lot of don'ts in my talk and the girl, rather than seeing these as a matter of personal choice, took pity on me.
But her assessment of me as different and weird accurately reflects a widespread wariness amongst the general population of overt religion. It is the place of observant Muslims in a secular society that conjures up this irrational fear and the perception that Muslims represent an ideological affront to a secular lifestyle.
It is not a Muslim's spiritual beliefs in heaven and hell, the big bang, creationism or Darwinism. It is the hijab , the beard, the call to prayer, the fasting during work hours, the praying during lunch breaks, the self-discipline against indulging even in moderation, even in tiny small doses! I don't think the divide that has made Muslims feel like "the other" is based on race, colour or culture.
It is a divide based on religious observance. Italians and Greeks may go to church on Sunday or wear a cross around their necks, but most date, enjoy a drink and have the appearance of religious anonymity. The religious observance is not explicit, and that is why their "integration" is perceived as a success of multiculturalism, whereas the Australian-ness of a non-drinking Muslim bloke who steps out of work to go pray at lunchtime, or a woman at the bus-stop with a suit and hijab on, is circumspect. Well, what about orthodox Jewish women, I hear you protest. They cover their hair with a wig and only expose it to their husbands as a symbol of modesty.
And what about nuns who also wear a veil? And Mormons, who have strict dress codes and also do not drink? It is most interesting. So many similarities between Islam and other faiths and yet for every five or more documentaries a week about Muslims, Muslim women or the veil, there are virtually none about the almost identical principles of modesty found in Judaism, or Paul's admonition to women in Corinthians that their hair should be cut off if it is not covered.
Perhaps it is because of the increasing size of the Australian Muslim population. Do we accept people as Australians as long as we can manage the size of their minority status? The less noticeable they are, the more acceptable they become?
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Time and time again, the values debate has centred on the role of women in Islam perceived as oppressed and the role of women in the West championed as liberated. In the recent past, Prime Minister John Howard has called for "some Muslim migrants to learn English and treat women better in order to fit in with Australian values". He later defended himself, saying he was referring to a small section of the Muslim population.
The qualification was laughable. If the Prime Minister was so genuinely concerned about women's rights in religion, he should not have stopped at Muslims. No headlines about that. And is Christianity so innocent? According to Ecclesiastics Sin began with a woman and thanks to her we all must die. Our society is palpably silent on the exploitation of other religions to deny women their rights.
And yet, when a Muslim displays a patriarchal, misogynist attitude, the public and our politicians are outraged, as though — God forbid — there are no sexist, chauvinistic non-Muslim men. That our sports heroes have been embroiled in shocking scandals involving the degradation and alleged rape and sexual assault of women is forgotten. That there have been gang rapes perpetrated by Anglo-Australians whose ethnic identity is never revealed is ignored.
And all your male friends need to pass a screen test where she will filter them out and decide which ones will do and which will not. No you do not get to have a say. We went to the mall alot and yes her mom was very protective, and if other woman would look at us, the woman I was dating would give the evil eye look.
We actually went to prom together and had the chance of meeting her mom, thought it was going to be a good stepping stone, until the pictures were with other middle eastern girls and I was the only guy. She was always precise time wise, If I were a minute late to pick her up she would give the annoyed look and roll her eyes, again going back to her parents, she had to lie about everywhere she went when we went out, we took a few trips together and I felt bad that she had to constantly deceive her parents. Money wise though she was pretty wealthy from her parents, so If she sometimes bought dinner, no problem.
I loved dating her and learning about her culture and spending time with her.
The 6 Annoying Dating Habits of Middle Eastern Women
If we got married she made a specific command that I had to convert to Islam for our marriage to work. I gave up a great woman who was sweet, beautiful, wealthy, intelligent, and knew what she wanted in life, in the end it was a good learning experience. So you are a dude, complaining cuz you didnt get as many middle eastern pussy as you wanted. Please tell us the truth. Lol this is what ALL middle eastern girls are like! You hit it in the head.
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She is totally hot and my parents love her more then me…but sex sucks and she is controlling. Haha this article was funny, if one likes stereotype humor which i do , and i give it that in this kind of humor there is also more than a grain of truth. Hii marko Iam middle eastern girl and romanticaly involved with american man ,we have same sad story as you are ,my family completly hate him without meeting him.
I will say ,me and him being together for 10 years,yestrday it was our annaversry yes we married last year we are completly commited to each other,and i love him so much Iam sure marko,you and her could make it ,think again. This kind of female just sounds very superficial with absolutely no brains.
I would pity the person who was silly enough to go out with a basket case example such as this. Maybe women like this should try living a life and only then go out with someone. I met a middle eastern girl who seems like she might be into me. But after reading this, I think I will run in the opposite direction. She already has the outgoing charm which is step one in this entry.
So in essence what you are saying is to date a middle eastern woman you basically have to surrender your rights and freedoms and be prepared to put up with pretty drama while also paying for everything. All the while not having a say and basically being a slave? Can I ask why anyone in their right mind would marry a Middle Eastern girl then?
She has two distinct personalities: She has said she wants to wait for marriage to have sex; she wants me to get a vasectomy reversal so she can have kids because time is running out for her, and I am an older man; she wants to take control of our finances, because she says I waste money yet she has no problem with me spending money on her.
So why am I still with her? Is it pure manipulation on her part?
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She does not and cannot compromise on anything. I feel like I am driving into a brick wall, but I am emotionally committed to her. So what do I do? Do I dump her, or do I demand to have my needs met, so that she will dump me?
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But I still ask the author of this article the question: That sounds pretty selfish of her.